Funny moments.

1. There is an actual way your supposed to squeeze toothpaste from a tube. I really need to read directions more often rather then suppose I know the answer.

2. There seems to be a spiritual truth found in eating strawberries. You never know what the inside will be though the outside looks great. One of my friends owns a produce place and he once told me they gas the strawberries to make them look ripe on the outside though the inside is still not ready. Think you can be reminded of things through this.

3. "Bugs can smell fear" or so someone in Caborca said.

4. When screaming "roach" in the night you find out who is really afraid of bugs and who just pretends to be or who is pretending not to be. You also find out you can not scare a roach by screaming but seem to attract them.

5. When a woman is pregnant it seems it is politically OK for strangers to walk up to her and suddenly touch her stomach. (a girl a work is having twins) Make sure she really is pregnant when you walk up to her and decide to touch her stomach and ask her how far along she is. (a woman who went on a cruise with my step-mom)

6. This whole pregnant joke reminds me of something funny one of my favorite comedians said. Bob Smiley in one of his comedic shows said that when his wife was pregnant she used to wake him up in the middle of the night to touch her stomach to feel the baby kicking. He said he got her to stop by waking her up in the middle of the night to touch his stomach every time he had gas. Ummm. NO comment but he is a very funny Christian comedian.

7. I found out labeling of kids works really well. If I ever become a mom or even just a teacher I have the best system ever. At Sea World I labled our 18 junior high girls. It worked so well. I wrote in pink sharpie a number on their hand (so they could not forget) and everytime we stopped I shouted out numbers. They counted off and I decided if I ever have kids I will not name them just label them (JK-it would be much more fun to try and call out names)

16. I really like ending titles with three dots...

17. God has a sense of humor and of this I am convinced. Just look at your life and all the funny things that happen including the stupid things you do. You know when something that comes out of your mouth is totally inappropriate at the time. Or when He creates the ironic situations you get in. Even when He watches you respond in the midst of embarassing or uncomfortable situations or the way you watch guys responding with girls and visa-versa. It is all very funny stuff that only a creater of the universe could orchestrate just right. I wonder if God laughs at us or with us?

18. A movie we watched last night had two very funny lines in it.

"Just go to the bathroom." (other person walks up to these two) " I haave to go to the bathroom!"

(guy locked in bomb shelter for 35 years) "I've been thinking about finding a girl for the last fifteen years or so." (something like that)

19. When smooshing your reclying under the teller station make sure your foot comes out with the shoe still on it.

20. Oh, and speaking of shoes they have caused me plenty of other moments this week.

Don't play with the mat that sits on the floor with your shoe while helping customers...you might just trip backwards wich seems very odd from someone who is not moving.

21. When walking quickly be careful not to step out of your shoe and thus fly forward at a rapid speed into who knows what or who.

22. Oh yes, a buisness with the initials P.C. in it may have nothing to do with computers...Doctors usually do not like being asked about their computer buisness.

23. When you leave out a charcoal drawing you may find random pawprints. To find who they belong to inspect favorit cat Tomi, favorite ferret Bear to find culprit. Second, even though your art desk is black your shirt may not be....well, it may be now but not everywhere. Just in places you were leaning against said black art desk.

24. When your expecting company do not think for sure they will be late. This means be aware of what your wearing and if it is not appropriate to answer the door in get it that way. This resulted in a mad dash across the living room at the chiming of the doorbell leading to an army style crawl through the dining room on hands and knees. I now have rug burn.

25. Don't ever order a large ice cream from McDonalds. (Hannah and Amy can attest to the problems it creates) First off your jaw drops as you see a tower coming toward you expecting the normal ice cream cone. Second it is difficult to talk and drive as it is summer and the kid behind the counter swirled the icecream to about three times the cones size. Let us think through this for a moment. It is summer and so very hot. We are now fighting weather and air conditioning as it blows directly onto the towers that are melting at increadible speeds.



I guess that is it. I just see things that crack me up all the time but few can I remember to put here.